The Riley Factor #37

The Riley Factor -- January 25
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 25 -- Smart bettors among readers are happy with Riley's two-for-two predictions on yesterday's NFL Conference Championship games, as the Colts covered the Jets plus seven-and-a-half and the Vikings covered (or pushed) the Saints (depending on whether you got the three-and-a-half points offered by some, or settled for the three points offered by others).  Although, in one dog's opinion, the best two teams in the NFL are not headed for this year's Superbowl, those being the Vikings and the Packers.  Riley woke this Monday morning to gentle rain falling all across Middle-of-Nowhere, and spent a half hour in the barn with Nancy and Gabby as the Herd gobbled its curds-and-whey, while Susan baked cranberry orange scones back in the bunkhouse.  Builders may or may not surface in today's precipitation to commence the building of the new back equipment shed.  Wind gusts equal today's temperatures -- both in the 50s.

The Riley Factor #36

The Riley Factor -- Weekend Edition -- January 23
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 23 -- Brilliant sunlight and frost on the trees greeted Riley on this gorgeous Saturday morning in Middle-of-Nowhere.  A nice walk around the back yard was a good start to the day.  Riley's newest favorite pastime is spending time out on the second story deck with Gabby -- great sunshine and views.  He did several half-hour tours of duty there yesterday, and did another early this morning just after sunrise.  House-break training is going very well, with Riley putting-up another 'accident'-free day on Friday.  Out to the greenhouse at noon on Saturday with Susan to check on this week's plantings.  Greenhouse temp was 90 degrees in the 100% sunlight day, while it was only 30 degrees outside.  "Now,where did I put my Speedo?" asked Riley, before basking for a half-hour under the glass roof as Susan toiled planting (tomatoes, cucumbers, lettuce, peppers, onions, and believe it or not, some luffa gourds -- can you say, "Honey, would you luffa my stretch marks?").  Next, off to an afternoon ride in the countryside in the Great White North, while listening to opera from the Met (no, no, not Oprah from Chicago) on NPR.

NFL Musings from Riley >>> Favre/Manning would make for a good Superbowl.  May come to pass.  Take the Vikes with the points (+3 1/2 )over New Orleans and Indy to cover the Jets (+8)

The Riley Factor #35

The Riley Factor -- January 22
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 22 -- Yesterday, Riley recorded his third-ever 'accident'-free day, as house-training marches-on with improvement.  Several times, Riley has requested to be let out to conduct his business.  Today, Riley and Gabby have been relegated to indoor activities, owing to too much activity going on outside.  It's early morning, with brilliant sun and warm temperatures, and much of the material for the new equipment shed arrived from Pennsylvania.  The 28'x52' building is being located out behind the garden shed, on the road to the back trails.  Susan spent the early hours watching the building pieces be delivered on an 18-wheeler and chatting-up the driver, who left Lancaster County at 4AM, expecting a six-hour trip, but made it by 8:30AM.  Elmer the Builder arrived in a GIANT forklift (think four five-feet in diameter tires and a boom able to lift a dozen 30-foot roof trusses at a time and carry them 20 feet off the ground at 20 mph, and you'll have the idea).  He unloaded the flat-bed and carried the materials back to the building site.  Later in the morning, a smaller truck arrived with the steel for the building roof, sides, doors, etc.  Riley napped on the kitchen floor while Gabby, tied outside to the pine tree, barked at the moon (or sun or workers or something).

The Riley Factor #34

The Riley Factor -- January 21
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 21 -- Riley and Gabriel, the Holstein, are becoming friends.  Yesterday, Riley spent several minutes in Gabriel's stall without his leash attached, and both enjoyed the time.  Riley and the Dexter Brothers still thrust and parry whenever in close proximity, with the bovine objective being with a flip of the noggin to air-mail the canine into next week.  Eli continues to be a bit unsure when confronted by the little Golden Retriever.  On this morning's run with Nancy and Gabby, in the brilliant sun and balmy breezes, Riley retired after a single lap, turning left and heading homeward when Nancy and Gabby had already made their right turns onto lap no. 2 on The Boulevard Trails.  They had to retreat and rescue The Riles from wandering aimlessly in search of the homestead.  Favorable progress continues on Project House Break, with Riley now occasionally asking to be let out to conduct his business.  Temps are rising, with upper 40s forecast for the upcoming Monday in Middle-of-Nowhere.  Construction on the new equipment shed should be commencing soon.

The Riley Factor #33

The Riley Factor -- January 20
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 20 -- Several mornings of runs through The Boulevard Trails have recently greeted Riley, followed by dog napping and usually afternoon runs as well.  Muscles are developing and house-break training is ongoing and improving.  Frequently, Riley is taken outside without his lifeline leash.  Occasionally, he asks to go out.  So-called in-home 'accidents' are generally down to about once per day.  He loves to romp in the snow, the deeper the better.  And leading the runs on an ATV generally lengthens the route.  Gabby and Riley wrestle all along the runs, with Gabby always the winner, owing to her age, experience and 30 pound weight advantage.  But Riley never fails to run back in search of being tossed to the ground yet again.  They both love to be taken further and further from the house, out to the back of the trails and fields, with an occasional brief diversion into the woods.  Riley has yet been tempted to chase a rabbit or squirrel, but that time is sure to come soon, especially since Gabby eagerly takes the bait and runs after the wildlife, only to come up empty.  It remains to be seen what would occur if she actually caught some small animal prey.

The Riley Factor #32

The Riley Factor -- Weekend Edition
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 16 -- Day broke this January 16 with Riley & Company bidding a fond farewell to CJ, who was visiting Middle-of-Nowhere to help celebrate the completion of his first quarter century of life on this third rock from the sun.  It was at 11:59AM 25 years ago today that CJ was welcomed into the world at St. Francis Hospital in Hartford.  Quickly following the bon voyage was a brisk walk around The Boulevard Trails for Riley with Nancy, Susan, Chris and Gabby.  Next, the obligatory dog-nap.  Riley sprung to life at the door knock to greet Hank Burton with all the enthusiasm normally reserved for a dog's master returning home from some five-minute trip to the store or five-month journey around the world.  Hank is the man who did all the excavating for our buildings and fields in 2007, and stops-in every week or two or three when he is on one of his periodic goodwill journeys around the area.

Saturday afternoon was the second perfect day in a row for running the ATVs around the trails on the snow.  After CJ and Chris did the test driving late Friday, everyone got into the act on Saturday.  Much speeding and sliding around with only the very occasional need to assist a stuck vehicle.  Even the dogs were running around the trails while the ATVs were motoring.  Beautiful warm sunny day with fairly firm snow and frozen ground -- perfect.  Eventually, Riley pooped-out and was driven back-in by Susan on the back of the Polaris 500.  Susan, Chris and Riley all sat out back on the Dodge City porch and swing and watched the sun drift over the hills beyond the pond late in the day.

The Riley Factor #31

The Riley Factor
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 14 -- Riley slept-in until 8:30 this morning with Chris, and then bounded down the stairs, including a face-plant emanating from the final three steps.  Then it was outside into the pleasant 25 degree temps for his morning constitutional.  After a breakfast of kibble, Riley joined Susan, Chris and Gabby on a long walk through the trails up to the top of the property and back.  It is good to see that Gabby has recovered from last night's bout with the Dog Flu -- H1K9.  Reminiscent of Jack, Riley stopped every 20-30 feet and looked back to see that he had not been abandoned, that the human guides had not mysteriously vanished from his proximity.  On the entire hour long stroll, Jack and Gabby stayed within 100 feet of the human pack leaders, and mostly were within 20 feet or so.  On the trails, there is a good mix of firm packed snow and eight to 15 inch fluffy drifts and areas, which make for good dog snooping, sniffing and lying about.  With no flowing water to be seen, the dogs were forced to eat snow for their fluid intake.  Near the end of the walk, Riley and Gabby engaged in some serious rough-house play, accompanied with much growling, rolling in the snow and even a few minor barks.  Neither canine seemed very worried about the other, but Gabby is currently clearly the dominant alpha dog.  Riley's strength lies in provoking, at which he excels.  Both Riley and Gabby fell into deep naps upon their returns to the warmth of the hearth.  Riley eagerly awaits tonight's visit from CJ, commenting, "It will be good to see CJ again.  I have fond memories of him rescuing me from that Bay State pet jail in which I was so unjustly confined after my trip east from South Dakota.  Free the man, errr, the dog!  QA.  Woof."

The Riley Factor #30

The Riley Factor
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 13 -- High 15, low 15, everywhere, every hour, 15, 15, 15 degrees today in Middle-of-Nowhere for Riley & Company.  Perfect weather though for digging the Ute out of an over-sized snow drift almost as far as possible from home while still being on the property.  Nothing that the big tractor and a big chain couldn't handle with help from Chris, Ephram & Riley.  Actually, all Riley did was stay home with Susan and Nancy and kept the fires warm.  Riley is well on his way to putting-on his winter 10, becoming a virtual Gold's Gym workout for some lucky soul each time he needs hoisting up on to one venue or another built for humans but love by canines.  But he barked that "it's all muscle" as he sat on Professor Mittens in one of the rocking chairs next to the wood stove.  Shockingly, The Professor didn't move a whisker as Riley's generously proportioned hind quarters plopped on the sleeping Professor's back porch to create a genetically mismatched pile of fur and claws in the middle of the rocker -- both rested comfortably for several minutes.

The Riley Factor #29

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 12 -- "Too damn cold", mooed Michael and Raphael this morning when let out into the pasture.  After a brief jaunt outside the barn doors on the edge of the pasture, they ran back into the warmth of the barn.  "We love Susan and Nancy and would rather be inside with them than running around the pasture freezing our moos off," added Gabriel.  "I'm too little", added Eli, "I just follow the big moos around".  After challenging the Dexter brothers once or twice in the large cattle stall, only to suffer the force of the now-famous Dexter charge and head-butt, Riley joined Susan on his morning constitutional around the back yard.  Twenty-five and cloudy with some snow showers, followed by temps near 40 later in the week.  Gabby and Riley joined Susan and Chris for this afternoon's running of the bulls.  No casualties reported.

The Riley Factor #28

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 11 -- A beautiful morning greeted Riley to start his work week, with warmer temperatures and snow showers expected throughout the day.  Riley slept-in until 7:30AM on Monday, and then took a brief walk around the back yard.  Then, Susan cuddled with Riley in the rocking chair next to the fire -- a true Norman Rockwell moment.

Yesterday, after spending the afternoon in the greenhouse with Susan, in balmy 65 degree temps, Riley settled-in to watch the Packers/Cardinals NFL Playoff game.  In summary ...

Ode to the NFL's Smallest Market Team
The vaunted young team from Green Bay
Went out to the desert that day.
When the teams had both met
And the footballs were let
The defenses had forgotten to play.

The Packers, they scored 45.
The Cardinals remained still alive.
With the overtime ready,
And both offenses steady,
Arizona stood tall and survived.

The coin, it was tossed, and was tails.
Green Bay's offense was riding on rails.
The ball, it was snapped.
Rodgers face, it was zapped.
And Cardinals danced like a bunch of females.

A Final Thought >>> It is never good when the game is over and the team you were playing against has thrown more touchdown passes than incomplete passes.

The Riley Factor #27

The Riley Factor
(All the news that's fit to print, along with some unfit to print rumors, prognostications and bloviations.)

Fort Plain, NY, January 10 -- An early morning walk around The Boulevard Trails with Nancy and Gabby welcome Riley to Wild Card Sunday morning in Middle-of-Nowhere.  Even with no breeze, the minus 1 degree temperature was a frosty beginning to the day.  He and Gabby fared well in the cold, as Nancy shivered her way back home after two laps.  By that time, the fires were burning and breakfast was imminent.  With the Patriots playing the Ravens in Foxborough at 1PM and the Packers marching into the desert to face the Cardinals at 4:40PM, non-football viewing activities are scheduled to be completed early in the day.  A pre-game nap-fest was held by Susan, Nancy, Riley & Gabby.

On today's NFL schedule playoff contests, Riley advised, "For those of you who are inclined to wager a bit, take the Patriots -3 and the pick-'em Packers.  Those of you who followed my Saturday picks fared one-and-one, as the Jets and Cowboys moved on.  I'd say 'NFL' truly is going to mean 'Not-For-Long' for several Eagles coaches and players.  But today's picks are much better bets."

Today's NFL Trivia Question -- What NFL quarterback has the highest career post-season passing completion percentage?  That's right, it is the Packers' Bart Starr (1956-1971, 1977 Hall of Fame inductee).  Bonus question -- Which team has won the most NFL titles?  Those Green Bay Packers, with 12 NFL championship trophies.

The Riley Factor #26

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 9 -- A beautiful day in Middle-of-Nowhere greeted Riley upon his awakening at 7AM -- bright sun, blue sky with puffy white clouds, slight breeze and five degrees temperature -- oh well, three out of four isn't bad.  Riley spent some time in the garage while we were on a hunt for just that right piece of sheet-rock for neighbor Steve Bartlett's bathroom wall repair job.  He then retreated for that ever-present morning nap in the dog-bed by the kitchen stove.  When asked about his afternoon plans, Riley commented that, "This is NFL Wildcard Playoff Weekend!  The Jets will have a tougher time in Cincinnati than they had beating the daylights out of the Bengals (37-0) in New Jersey last Sunday but should prevail, and that the Eagles just don't seem like a three-and-a-half point underdog in Dallas, in spite of dropping a 24-0 decision there last weekend -- take the Jets +1 and Philly +3.5, if you must bet.  But the smarter play is to wait until tomorrow and pounce on those Patriots -3 and Packers (pick-'em) for the big bucks."

In related news, according to the AP ... "Peyton Manning has become the first player to win The Associated Press NFL Most Valuable Player award four times.  The Indianapolis Colts' sensational quarterback romps to the award Saturday in balloting by 50 sports writers and broadcasters who cover the league. He gets 39 1/2 votes to 7 1/2 for  Drew Brees as only quarterbacks received any backing."  "That is the problem with letting these humans drink on election day," quipped Riley.  "How do 50 sportswriters at a keg party get the authorization to vote for NFL MVP -- Who invented that approach?  Where were the votes for Brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers, caught-up in some hanging-chad controversy in West Palm Beach?  Where were the election supervisors and observers -- at the sports head injury clinic in Cleveland having their dosages adjusted?"

"Where's my bone?," grumbled an obviously agitated Riley.  "And send one of those cats in here for a chase around the room".

The Riley Factor #25

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 8 -- "Wired" was the one-word best description for Riley as dawn broke today.  He ran around like a madman until Nancy and Susan took Riley and Gabby on a two-lap stroll around The Boulevard trails.  Then, Riley collapsed into a morning nap.  Later, he joined Susan and Chris on a surveying exercise aimed at locating the next new barn, 'needed' for equipment and other storage, after which a trip into the Town of Fort Plain (don't miss this tourist attraction) to visit the hardware store (I am shooting for the title of Fort Plain True Value Customer of the Week, having been there every day this week, including three shopping visits yesterday).  Right now, as the sun sets, Riley is digging into the large potted plant searching for stones to chew and leave lying around the house, while concurrently tormenting Stryder in a one-way effort to effect so-called 'playing' with a cat.  Arwyn threw-in her two cents with a one-handed (one-pawed) swipe across Riley's nose as she strolled by the fracas.  Medical report to follow.

The Riley Factor #24

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 7 -- Riley did two circuits on the trails this morning with Nancy, Susan and Gabby.  Much running and nose-plowing into the snow transpired.  As expected, his favorite activity is running in the deep drifts.  He also sniffs long and low into tracks and trails encountered -- the great hunter in training.  After his morning exercise, Riley rode into Dodge with Marshall Fuchs, for the obligatory visits to the post office and hardware store.

The Riley Factor #23

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 6 -- Wednesday marked a lazy day for Riley and company.  Early in the morning, Nancy took Gabby and Riley for a walk around The Boulevard, which was followed by much canine napping.  Mild temperatures in the upper 20s with little breeze made a perfect setting for the day.  Riley continues with his house training activities, and at mid-day, he had none of his proverbial 'accidents'.  Should he make it all the way through to 8PM, he will have accomplished a 24-hour error free day, for only his second time since joining the Upstate New York menagerie.  Annie and Ephram are in the house (and around the grounds) today, working at various tasks and offering more than the usual set of distractions for the four month old Retriever.

The Riley Factor #22

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 5 -- Cold and windy were the weather words of the day, which was mostly cloudy with gentle snow falling much of the time.  But 25 and windy is no way to go through life son.  Riley the Retriever spent the day running around inside and out, with two or three trips down to the barn to play with the Herd of Four.  He also had a play date outside with Gabby, under the watchful supervision of Queen Nancy.  Riley and Gabby 'fought' over custody of the one remaining dog bone, with Gabby capturing the flag, much to the dismay of the pup.  When the rough-housing was done for the evening, Riley commented, "Happy Birthday, Stevie".  And continued on under his breath, "Can't a dog get a decent bone around this Middle-of-Nowhere dog pound?"  Oh well, on go the trials and tribulations of a dog's life.

The Riley Factor #21

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 3 -- Nine degree temperatures, minus 11 degrees wind chill and blowing snow greeted Riley on the first Sunday of the new year.  "It's as cold as I have ever seen it around here", barked Riley, after his icy cold speed-walk to and from the barn for the morning feeding of the Herd of Four, chickens and turkeys.  Barn temperatures were balmy in the low 30s (bovine heated) while outside were near white-out conditions.  "It's a little chilly", commented Susan, "but it is going to warm up.  And the winds are expected to die down".  Even the felines, afraid of becoming catsicles, were content to remain inside in the confines near the kitchen stove.  AJ and Stryer slapfested themselves silly as Riley and Susan refereed -- championship belt goes to Stryder.  Professor Mittens and Arwyn were happily cuddling-up and snoring on one chair or another.

The Riley Factor #20

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 2 -- A brisk 20 degrees with 20 mph breezes and light snow showers greeted Riley on this first Saturday of the new year.  After an early morning foray into the barn to visit the Herd of Four, Riley spent some time outside playing with Gabby on a walk out onto the lower pond and into the orchard.  Ponds are frozen rock solid.  Next up was a long Ute ride and walk with Susan and Chris, including a several hundred yard walking detour on one of the logging roads in the woods.  Very peaceful.  Many fresh tracks were investigated, including those left by deer, turkeys, rabbits, canines of some sort, and various and sundry other members of the non-domesticated wild life family.  Riley entered the house shivering, but settled nicely into a nap in the Riley-bed next to the kitchen wood stove, while Chris and Susan investigated the bottoms of their emptying hot chocolate mugs.

The Riley Factor #19

The Riley Factor

Fort Plain, NY, January 1, 2010 -- Riley went on his first ever morning run, traversing from the upper fields (field no. 3) down to the canine's main lodge, early on New Year's Day with Susan, Nancy and Gabby.  After riding up to the top of the freshly snow covered property in the Ute, he and Susan exited to make the return trip on foot.  Later, Riley spent a half hour wandering the orchard and pasture with Susan, playing Charge-the-Bull/Get-Charged-

by-the-Bull with the Herd of Four, Michael, Raphael, Gabriel and Eli.  Giving-up over a hundred pounds to even the smallest bovine competitor, Riley relies on his quickness and small size to avoid tumbling like an on-side kick after undesirable contact with the head or hoof of one of the challenging steers.  Oh what fun!  By 9AM, Riley was comatose under the dining table, recovering from his early morning antics.  Today's Fort Plain weather update: 35-40 degrees with snow showers.  Today's Hockey Update: Bruins/Flyers game on tap today, Fenway Park, 1PM.  Today's NFL Headline: Packers Continue to Rule; next NFL update: Sunday 1PM.